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ref: 89db8a0db3b15ad1a131b443ccfe2a0d5f08170a sive.rs/site/slow -rw-r--r-- 3.3 KiB
89db8a0d — Derek Sivers formatting 4 months ago
                                                                                
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<title>I’m a very slow thinker | Derek Sivers</title>
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<h1><a href="/" title="Derek Sivers">Derek Sivers</a></h1>
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<header>
<div class="blogparent">from the book “<a href="/n">Hell Yeah or No</a>”:</div>
<h1>I’m a very slow thinker</h1>
<small>2016-08-26</small>
  <audio src="https://m.sive.rs/sive.rs.slow.mp3" preload="none" controls="controls"></audio>
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<p>
	When a friend says something interesting to me, I usually don’t have a reaction until much later.
</p><p>
	When someone asks me a deep question, I say, “Hmm. I don’t know.”
	The next day, I have an answer.
</p><p>
	I’m a disappointing person to try to debate or attack.
	I just have nothing to say in the moment, except maybe, “Good point.”
	Then a few days later, after thinking about it a lot, I have a response.
</p><p>
	This probably makes me look <a href="/ss">stupid</a> in the moment, but I don’t mind.
	I’m not trying to win any debates.
</p><p>
	In fact, I’ll tell you a secret.
	When someone wants to interview me for their show, I ask them to send me some questions a week in advance.
	I spend hours writing down answers from different perspectives, before choosing the most <a href="/counter">interesting</a> one.
	Then when we’re in a live conversation, I try to make my answers sound spontaneous.
</p><p>
	People say that your first reaction is the most honest, but I disagree.
<strong>
	Your first reaction is usually outdated.
</strong>
	Either it’s an answer you came up with long ago and now use instead of thinking, or it’s a knee-jerk emotional response to something in your past.
</p><p>
	When you’re less impulsive and more deliberate like this, it can be a little inconvenient for other people, but that’s OK.
	Someone asks you a question.
	You don’t need to answer.
	You can say, “I don’t know,” and take your time to answer after thinking.
	Things happen.
	Someone expects you to respond.
	But you can say, “<a href="/horses">We’ll see</a>.”
</p><p>
	And maybe, through example, you can show them that they can do the same.
</p>
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<div class="small">(Tree sculpture by <a href="http://kimbeatonstudios.com/">Kim Beaton</a>.)</div>

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