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<!doctype html><html lang=en-us><head profile=http://www.w3.org/2005/10/profile><link rel=icon type=image/ico href=https://thetaliaferrotimes.org/favicon.ico><meta charset=utf-8><meta name=viewport content="width=device-width,initial-scale=1,shrink-to-fit=no"><meta name=generator content="Hugo 0.68.3"><link rel=icon href=/logo-small.png><title>Through the eyes of anxiety | The Taliaferro Times Online</title><meta name=description content="The official newspaper and creative writing club of Booker T. Washington High School."><meta name=keywords content="Tulsa,The Taliaferro Times,newspaper,BTW,Booker T.,Booker T. Washington High School,School,news,opinion,Oklahoma,creative writing,write,articles,posts"><link href=/css/bootstrap.min.css rel=stylesheet><link href=/css/everything.css rel=stylesheet><script src=/js/darkreader.js></script><script>function darkmode_starting_up(){var savedTheme=localStorage.getItem("dark-mode-storage")||"dark";if(savedTheme==="dark"){DarkReader.enable();}
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<span class=navbar-toggler-icon></span></button><div class="collapse navbar-collapse" id=navbarMediumish><ul class="navbar-nav ml-auto"><li class=nav-item><a class=nav-link href=/about/>About</a></li><li class=nav-item><a class=nav-link href=/coronavirus/>Coronavirus</a></li><li class=nav-item><a class=nav-link href=/latest/>Latest Updates</a></li><li class=nav-item><a class=nav-link href=/search/>Search</a></li><li class=nav-item><a href=https://www.twitter.com/btw_news><i class="fab fa-twitter social-icon nav-link" aria-hidden=false></i></a><a href=https://www.instagram.com/btw_news><i class="fab fa-instagram social-icon nav-link" aria-hidden=true></i></a><a class="fas fa-sun nav-link social-icon" aria-hidden=true onclick=darkmode_toggle(); id=dark-mode-toggle title="Toggle Dark Mode" style=cursor:pointer></a></li></ul></div></div></nav><div class=site-content><div class=container><div class=mainheading><h1 class=sitetitle>The Taliaferro Times Online</h1><p class=lead>Where your voice matters.</p></div><meta name=description content="Through the eyes of anxiety…
I come in the dark, when you least expect me and never asked for me. I come in the hushed whispers, telling you you’re never going to be good enough."><meta name=keywords content="Tulsa,The Taliaferro Times,newspaper,BTW,Booker T.,Booker T. Washington High School,School,news,opinion,Oklahoma,creative writing,write,articles,posts"><div class=main-content><div class=container><div class=row><div class="col-md-2 pl-0"><div class="share sticky-top sticky-top-offset"><script src=/js/mastodon.js></script><p>Share</p><ul><li class="ml-1 mr-1"><a target=_blank href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?text=Through%20the%20eyes%20of%20anxiety&url=https%3a%2f%2fthetaliaferrotimes.org%2f2019%2f02%2f2019-02-01-through-the-eyes-of-anxiety-by-baylee-mcdonald%2f" onclick="window.open(this.href,'twitter-share','width=550,height=435');return false;"><i title="Share on Twitter :(" class="fab fa-twitter"></i></a></li><li class="ml-1 mr-1"><a target=_blank href="https://facebook.com/sharer.php?u=https%3a%2f%2fthetaliaferrotimes.org%2f2019%2f02%2f2019-02-01-through-the-eyes-of-anxiety-by-baylee-mcdonald%2f" onclick="window.open(this.href,'facebook-share','width=550,height=435');return false;"><i title="Share on Facebook :(" class="fab fa-facebook-f"></i></a></li><li class="ml-1 mr-1"><a target=blank_ href="https://www.xing.com/spi/shares/new?url=https%3a%2f%2fthetaliaferrotimes.org%2f2019%2f02%2f2019-02-01-through-the-eyes-of-anxiety-by-baylee-mcdonald%2f" onclick="window.open(this.href,'xing-share','width=550,height=435');return false;"><i title="Share on Xing :(" class="fab fa-xing"></i></a></li><li class="ml-1 mr-1"><i title="Share on Mastodon :)" style=cursor:pointer class="fab fa-mastodon" onclick=share_mastodon()></i></input></li></ul></div></div><div class="col-md-9 flex-first flex-md-unordered"><div class=mainheading><h1 class=posttitle>Through the eyes of anxiety</h1><div class="col-xs-12 col-md-9 col-lg-10 text-center text-md-left md-nopad-left"><span class=author-description>by <b><a id=author-link href=/author/Baylee-McDonald>Baylee McDonald</a></b><br><i class="far fa-star fa-fw"></i>Feb 1, 2019
<i class="far fa-clock clock fa-fw"></i>2 min read</span></div></div><p></p><div class=article-post><p>Through the eyes of anxiety…</p><p>I come in the dark, when you least expect me and never asked for me. I come in the hushed whispers, telling you you’re never going to be good enough. I come because I know you’ll never need me the way I so desperately need you. How I feed off your fear. Your insecurities. Your mood. How I need you in the ways I quicken your breath and the shaking of your voice. The panic in your heart and the utter feeling of no control. I need you in selfish ways because nothing I ever say is true, but because you’ve known me for so long you blindly let me take the wheel. I come to scare away your friends because in the end you’ll always have me. I come to tell you how you’ll never be enough, I take your hope and I shatter your dreams because it’s only fair that you share your reflection with me. You’ll see me in the way your lips trimble as you look in the mirror, noticing every imperfection. You’ll hug me close when you crumble on the bathroom floor in a puddle of regret and miscommunication. You’ll shake my hand when the semester starts and I introduce my friends. Procrastination waiting outside your door, depression falling on your floor, anger and pride will shake the walls. I’ll shove you in a corner then run and hide, we’ll play a game, us against you. And when you finally break, when your mind is numb and you’ve got nothing left for us to take, we leave you alone. Alone in your mind, killing yourself a thousand times; because you’ll never truly be rid of me. I’ll always creep back in when you least expect it. You can lock your doors and cover your windows but you can never shut off my voice playing on repeat. Laughing and calling you fat, ugly, stupid, worthless. My friends will join in and you’ll drown all over again, because in the end, don’t I always win?</p></div><div class=article-post><div class=post-info><hr class=post-end><ul class=tags><i class="fas fa-tags fa-fw"></i><li><a href=/tags/creative-writing>#creative-writing</a></li></ul><p><i class="fas fa-file-alt fa-fw"></i>343 Words</p><p><i class="fas fa-code-branch fa-fw"></i><a href=https://git.sr.ht/~exprez135/taliaferro/commit/3741748dda418793de19ddd77abc1ff41ad26dcb>3741748d</a> @ 2020-01-01</p><p>See more from Baylee McDonald <a href=/author/Baylee-McDonald>here</a>.</p><p>Send feedback and letters to the editor to <a href=mailto:feedback@thetaliaferrotimes.org>feedback@thetaliaferrotimes.org</a>.</p></div></div><div class="row PageNavigation d-flex justify-content-between font-weight-bold"><a class="d-block col-md-6" href=/2019/02/2019-02-01-procrastination-by-ian-benway/>&#171; Procrastination</a><div class=clearfix></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="jumbotron fortags"><div class="d-md-flex h-100"><div class="col-md-4 transpdark align-self-center text-center h-100"><div class="d-md-flex align-items-center justify-content-center h-100"><h2 class="d-md-block d-none align-self-center py-1 font-weight-light">Explore <span class="d-none d-md-inline"></span></h2></div></div><div class="col-md-8 p-5 align-self-center text-center"><a class="mt-1 mb-1" href=/tags/btw-news>#btw-news</a>
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